Incivility is Infectious, and it Silences Women
When co-workers act without civility, women are more likely than men to keep their ideas to themselves. This is owing to the backlash women anticipate. Researchers Kristin Bain, et al, write in Harvard Business Review (HBR): “Due to gender-role expectations, challenging others may be seen as a more unexpected and norm-violating behavior when women do it. Women who speak up risk facing gender backlash: repercussions for violating gender-based expectations.”
When women are silenced by incivility, their companies lose their full participation. Additionally, those experiencing incivility might chose to find a better work environment elsewhere. Incivility, then, has a negative impact on both the employees experiencing it and the company tolerating it.
Examples of incivility at work include incidents of interrupting others, not showing appreciation for their contributions, making demeaning comments, and paying little attention to the opinions of others, researchers Suojung Han et all write in the Journal of Organizational Behavior. Those suffering the incivility not only withhold their ideas from their organization. They might also experience emotional exhaustion and other negative impacts on well-being, poorer performance, and reduced trust, the researchers write. The financial impact of incivility on an organization was estimated at $14,000 per employee in a study cited in a 2018 HBR article.
“It is no surprise that both men and women are less likely to speak up when the group is uncivil,” Bain, et al, write. “But employers should know that women may be looking for cues about whether a particular group is safe for sharing, and incivility can signal greater risk, suppressing women’s contributions even more than men’s.”
If incivility is tolerated, it is likely to spread. “[T]he No. 1 predictor of instigating incivility on a co-worker was receiving incivility from someone else,” organizational psychologist Larry Martinez, PhD writes in Psychology Today. The second predictor is working in a climate that tolerates uncivil behavior, Martinez writes.
While it is imperative, then, for organizations to have zero-tolerance policies for incivility, how to enforce such a policy is an open question for many supervisors. Researchers Christine M. Pearson and Chistine L. Porath have the following suggestions:
Engraving, 1769. (Wellcome Library, London. CC BY 4.0)
First, managers must reflect on their own behavior. “[T]reating employees with anything less than respect and dignity at all times increases the odds of an aggressive response,” Pearson and Porath write. They suggest leaders seek feedback. This might include reviewing with a peer or consultant a video of a meeting to assess their conduct.
Next, keep instigators out of your organization. There is typically broad consensus among co-workers about who the uncivil colleagues are. Thoroughly check references at all levels of candidates’ past organizations to avoid hiring those widely recognized as perpetrating incivility.
Teach civility, and tie civil behavior to career advancement. Skills-based training can help people improve their skills in stress management (stress is often cited as an excuse for uncivil behavior), conflict resolution, listening, and negotiation.
Identify instigators and take action to curb their incivility. Identification can be done through anonymous surveys and careful observation. Investigate the complaints that lower level employees make against supervisors, even if their higher-ups have never witnessed uncivil behaviors.
Follow through. If reported incivilities aren’t addressed, then workers will become hopeless and stop reporting it. Incivility will likely spread and valuable workers will find opportunities elsewhere.
One in eight victims of incivility will leave the organization, Pearson and Porath found. By conducting interviews with former employees after they have moved on, organizations will likely gain more candid observations than they will from current employees who fear repercussions.
Curbing incivility contributes to more equitable workplaces. Tolerating it is not an acceptable option.
Please subscribe to The Architectress.